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Category Archives: Addiction and Relationships

Dark Holidays? This One’s For You

2020by Heidi

Ready for a different kind of holiday? This worked for me.

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Addiction and Relationships

You Don’t Say (to an addict)

Featuredby Heidi

When tied is a good thing.

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Addiction and Relationships, Relating to Addicts

Functional Alcoholic Signs

2020by Heidi

It’s so tricky to diagnose that I had friends telling me I couldn’t be alcoholic, even though I knew I was.

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Addiction and Relationships, Relating to Addicts, Step 1 Tips

Listen With Your Eyes

2020by Heidi

Discerning reality is no easy task for addicts. Here’s a hint: Listen with your eyes. It works. When a person or activity is pulling me back into romancing of the […]

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Addiction and Relationships, Relating to Addicts

Lucky Unlucky Addicts

2020by Heidi

The following comment from Resentment Rats is too wonderful to leave in the archives of comments: So much lays beneath what we can easily see in ourselves. And how many […]

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Addiction and Relationships, Spirituality

Should You Tell Children About Alcoholism in the Family?

2020by Heidi

I recently read a blog entry about an alcoholic death of a grandparent. The blogger, whom I respect for his honesty and vulnerability, asked if the grandchild (his daughter) should […]

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Addiction and Relationships, Relating to Addicts

HFA: Shhhh

2020by Heidi

I’m an HFA (High-Functioning Alcoholic). Who knew? No one. Sometimes that’s the point. Secrecy, silent suffering, and deadly choices all whirl towards the alcoholic drain that becomes the high-functioning alcoholic’s […]

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Addiction and Relationships, Relating to Addicts

Have They Got Your Back or Do You Have to Watch Your Back?

2020by Heidi

Addicts who are still using or drinking naturally create a life of chaos for themselves and others. Relationships narrow into a posture of defensiveness, wariness and life itself takes on […]

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Addiction and Relationships, Sober Living

Relationship Reality: Part 1 The Not-So-Musical Triangle

2020by Heidi

A.  You accept where you are by facing the reality of your situation. Part of facing our reality is looking at the conversations we’re having. As addicts, we’re naturally drawn […]

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12 Steps, Addiction and Relationships

Alcoholics and Half-baked Relationships Part 7: Confusion VS Harmony

2020by Heidi

Is he not a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness out of this world if he only manages well? Is it not evident to all […]

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Addiction and Relationships, Relating to Addicts, Sober Living

Alcoholics and Half-baked Relationships Part 6: Manipulating the Ingredients

2020by Heidi

Welcome to life with an alcoholic! Life with a dry (not sober) alcoholic is a challenge. I should know, I’m a recovering alcoholic and I’m still a challenge. Before I […]

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Addiction and Relationships, Sober Living

Alcoholics and Half-baked Relationships Part 5: Conflicting Recipes

2020by Heidi

If his arrangements would only stay put, if only people would do as he wishes, the show would be great. Everybody, including himself, would be pleased. Life would be wonderful. […]

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Addiction and Relationships, Sober Living

Alcoholics and Half-baked Relationships Part 4: Mirror, Mirror On The Wall

2020by Heidi

Lies and deceitful games have nothing to do with the shared reality and richness of intimacy. True intimacy in relationships is reserved for people who are determined to hear and […]

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Addiction and Relationships, Sober Living

Alcoholics and Half-baked Relationships Part 3: You’re Getting Warmer

2020by Heidi

In the previous post, I compared heat in bread making to honest communication in relationships. The yeast could be comparable to love and commitment. Without the right amount of heat, […]

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Addiction and Relationships, Sober Living

Alcoholics and Half-baked Relationships Part 2: Why the Drama?

2020by Heidi

I never made a lot of bread until I got a machine to knead it for me because I have very weak arms. It is not fun to knead bread […]

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ACOA, Addiction and Relationships, Sober Living

Alcoholics and Half-baked Relationships Part 1: Recipe

2020by Heidi

I love to make bread. If it didn’t stick to my belly, I’d bake all the time.

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ACOA, Addiction and Relationships, Al-Anon, CODA, Sober Living

Freeze Dry the Drunk

2020by Heidi

If I wanted to stay angry with myself and hostile to those around me, I could have just kept drinking.

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Addiction and Relationships, Sober Living

Why Do I Tell People I’m an Alcoholic?

2020by Heidi

When I think of alcoholics I think of the ones around the tables. I realize you might not see us like I do. Maybe your mental picture of an alcoholic […]

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ACOA, Addiction and Relationships, Al-Anon, CODA, Step 12 Application

The Fighting Alcoholic Meets The Cowardly Lion

2020by Heidi

At first, I thought of really cutting and accurate remarks that I could make to her in my defense and then I surprised myself by realizing that I don’t want to do that.

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Addiction and Relationships, Sober Living, Step 10 Application

Saying Good-bye to My Father Who Never Drank

2020by Heidi

My Dad is lying in a hospital bed in Brainerd, MN. Just that is enough to cause concern about his survival. Small towns and hospitals—need I say more! Mom left […]

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Addiction and Relationships, Relating to Addicts

The Sensitive Side of an Alcoholic

2020by Heidi

When I was 4, I wanted to stay home and cook for my Dad when I grew up. I probably only remember that because my mom found it to be […]

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Addiction and Relationships, Humor

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